The Skinsider Celebrity Rumors, Celebrity Gossip, Breaking News on Who's Getting Nude
Horny Housewives — Miami Vice, Plastic Surgery-wise — Please Your Privates with Private — Edwige Fenech's Call Girls
August 29, 2006
Television may be close to a second Golden Age of jiggle thanks to such sexy soap fare as Desperate Housewives, which blesses us with Season Two (Extra Juicy Edition), out today on DVD. There may not be any explicit nudity on display here, but for prime-time network TV this is the bomb, the nude bomb as Maxwell Smart might say. This season naturally features its hot stars, such as top-heavy Teri Hatcher struggling to put on her hospital gown over her bra and panties in “We’re Gonna Be All Right,” more underwear action from Eva Longoria in “Silly People” and “I Wish I Could Forget You,” and Nicolette Sheridan in a sheer negligee in “There’s Something About a War.” But there’s also guest star Christina Cindrich as a stripper trying to get Eva to buy a lap dance. The Skinsider wishes he could be so desperate.
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Going under the knife was never as sexy as in Nip/Tuck, which releases its Complete Third Season today on DVD so we can all release. In this season our scalpel-happy plastic surgeons continue to do as much work between the sheets as they do in the operating theater. There’s a nipple slipple in “Derek, Alex, and Gary” from Kelly Carlson. Guest star Rebecca Metz gives viewers a before and after look at her bra-and-panty-clad body in “Abby Mays.” Back to “Derek, Alex, and Gary,” brunette stunner Rhona Mitra helps turn a routine bedroom romp with Kelly and Julian McMahon into a thrilling threesome. And if that’s not enough to refer you to this DVD set, here’s a second opinion: it’s hot!
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What do you expect when Italian sausage pleaser Tinto Brass mans the camera? Perversion in its most perverse form, that’s what. And the masturbator doesn’t fail to live up to his high (or is that low?) standard in Private: Unrated English Version, which is out today on DVD. There are two versions of the classic sexploitation film floating around, so a word on the difference. First, there is this version, which is also known as the “Producer’s Cut.” The other version, known as the “Italian/Director’s Cut” is about four minutes longer with a bit more hardcore elements, that is real, explicit sex. Still, there are more fully nude actresses in either version than you can count on two hands. Not that you’d want to. Best to keep one hand free to handle whatever might come up.
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Secrets of a Call Girl, out today on DVD, features the hot and delicious Edwige Fenech, who’s been in more movies naked than most people have seen clothed. The movie is as much a crime drama as a sexploitation, but that doesn’t mean that Edwige keeps you waiting for the goodies. She’s already stripping within the first twenty minutes, then getting naked in the shower a couple of minutes after that. She digs a bit of rough sex later in the movie, when her man rips her clothes off, and there’s still one more scene of her terrific T&A to go. This is one call girl who’s worth calling on anytime.
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There’s exploitation. Then there are the more specific niches within that niche, such as blaxploitation and sexploitation. As long as it’s exploitative then you’ve got the Skinsider’s attention. But the nunsploitation genre seems, well, sacrilegious. That may be so, but watching Story of a Cloistered Nun, out today on DVD, is sure pleasing to the Skinsider’s sack . . . and the whole package. The movie stars Eleonora Giorgi, who ends up pregnant in a convent, where she is fresh meat for the sex-hungry nuns cloistered there. So if you like lesbianism in black, white, and pink, get thee to a nunnery!
